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How do you beat the Monday blues?

How bad are we talking here? Do you feel uninspired? Or full blown shlumpy?
I get both versions of the Monday blues, particularly as the winter descends.

If you think you can fight them…

If it’s a lack of inspiration and a touch of the grey-morning fed-ups, then you could try crushing the blues under the weight of positivity.

  • To renew your faith in humans, find someone inspiring and determined then listen to them speak. TED is a great place to start- any of one of their 25 most popular talks will do the trick. Or, if you want to be cocooned in fierceness and intelligent observations about culture while you work, the Refinery29 ‘Strong Opinions, Loosely Held’ podcast is great.
  • Which leads me to my next recommendation, now that you are feeling more hopeful- get angry, GET REALLY RILED UP. There’s nothing like a rant about something that winds you up to regain your confidence. If possible, find someone to rant to: call a friend, or your mother, whatsapp your partner scrollably long messages, lean over a colleague’s desk until they want to return to their emails. One of my favourite harangues is about Taylor Swift, whose fake sweetness, vicious behaviour, talentless music and dangerously old-fashioned, misogynist public image, I can’t stand. Can you tell?
  • Confidence regained, I listen to some BIG music. Bon Jovi. Go.
  • I’m feeling better. I can make THE to-do list, the list that will rule the week with an iron fist. I put something quick and easy at the top, do it, cross it off. Keep going. Monday Blues crushed.

If you think they will win…then join them

Some Mondays just completely suck. I had brunch twice on the weekend, slept really well and had a great funny dinner at your apartment with my friends. Why can’t I live like that every day?!!

Or the opposite, I barely slept, I was knee deep in catch-up work all weekend, and now Monday?? Fuck you Monday.

This qualifies as the absolute Monday schlumps. Elizabeth Gilbert and Journey could power ballad together and it wouldn’t shift these blues. When this happens, you can’t fight them… so join them.

  • Buy popcorn. Eat it in such large fistfuls that a solid third of it falls onto your chest, eat that later from out of your clothing.
  • Imagine a giant Oprah stomping on your city of shit things- skyscrapers made of cold rain and wet feet, buses of stale bread, shops of shoes one size too small, restaurants of cold food and long waits, bars of tiny high stools and sticky tables. Then, once everything that pisses you off is rubble, you and Oprah rebuild it into a giant warm kitchen and plot how to make the world a better place while eating vegan oatmeal raising cookies.
  • Make a mess. Empty out drawers, cupboards, dig underneath furniture. Then sort through everything and make three piles- keep, donate, bin. The whole process is chaotic, ruthless and satisfying.
  • As soon as humanly possible, put on active wear, build a pillow (and snacks) fort and set up season 1 episode 1 of your favourite TV series.

To add fuel to your Taylor Swift diatribes: this article by Christian Kennedy and this excellent article by Rick Moody.

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